I recall the day my grandfather passed. It was heartbreaking, and I was devastated. No words could possibly console me, but a wet nose and paws on my lap assured me I wasn’t alone. My dog could comfort me without words, helping me begin the mourning process and heal the wounds that the loss of a significant person had caused.
While friends and family can offer comfort, a dog’s unconditional love and companionship can be uniquely therapeutic. Dogs have a remarkable ability to provide emotional support, reduce stress, and bring joy even in the darkest moments—and they do so in a completely judgment-free way.
Dogs are excellent at helping people grieve, and their emotional support is something that we don’t fully understand yet but can’t deny. Let’s discover how dogs help people grieve and overcome pain and loss.
The Unique Bond Between Humans and Dogs
The human and dog relationship is thousands of years old, and since that first dark night next to the fire when an early human was grieving and their faithful fur-friend crawled closer, our dogs have been there to support us in times of grief.
Since dogs have always seen humans as part of their pack, perhaps even in the alpha dog role, they watch us for the slightest signals. Therefore, dogs know how and when we feel strong emotions.
Dogs know when we need comfort, closeness, and connection. Dogs always seem to know what we need, whether they lick us, press their warm bodies against us, or put on antics to cheer us up. Dogs:
Offer Unconditional Love and Support
When people try to support us, we often wonder if they see us as weak, but dogs always think we are the best humans and pledge their undying faithfulness to us. Their support never comes with strings attached, and just because your dog is licking your tear-stained face now doesn’t mean they will tell the other dogs about you later.
Feeling supported and loved in an absolutely unconditional way is great for our weary minds and soothes our broken hearts. In fact, the American Heart Association has reported that pet owners have a lower chance of heart disease because their dogs offer emotional support and care, which relieves stress on the heart.
Alleviate Loneliness
Because loss makes us feel alone, having a dog helps counter this negative and sad feeling. Grief may pass more smoothly (if not quicker) when we don’t feel overwhelmed by loneliness. Thankfully, a dog means we must “keep living” and go into the world.
Because of dogs, you have to shop, take them for walks, and socialize with other dog owners, which can help the grieving and healing process.
Give Us Routine and Responsibility
Dogs provide one of the most fundamental needs for healing and recovery after loss – routine.
Even if it’s as simple as feeding your dog twice a day, having a routine can help you feel some security in an uncertain time. Feeling like you are still responsible can help pull you back from despair and motivate you to continue life.
Provide Physical Activity and Health Benefits
Physical activity is great for helping lighten your mood and is also important for leading a healthy lifestyle. When you’ve just lost someone dear to you, going to the gym may be the last thing on your mind. Getting exercise or movement won’t seem important or even necessary, which is why many people become immobile while grieving.
Yet, when you own a dog, they will ensure you get up, get dressed, and take them for walks. They will do what your family may want to do (but won’t), which is to drag you out of bed if you don’t get up.
Movement is life, and dealing with the opposite requires getting up and going. Your dog will help.
Share Emotional Expression and Comfort
While people may not instantly sense your pain and loss, your dog senses their owners’ distress. Most people will say they never really know what to do or say when sympathizing with someone grieving, but your dog knows.
Dogs instinctively comfort their packmates, and licking your face or hands can help release your grief and frustration. Without words, dogs make you feel seen.
Give Social Support and Community
Pet owners have a certain solidarity between them, and you may find that being around other dog owners can bring unexpected support from complete strangers. When you take your dog to the vet or the dog park, the other dog owners often sit, chat, and connect, which is vital to help you through grief.
The social aspect of participating in dog-related activities can help you come out of the shell of grief and function more normally.
The Benefits of Dogs for the Grieving
Scientists and behaviorists have examined the positive impact of pet ownership on mental health, particularly in the context of grief and loss. These studies provide evidence supporting the therapeutic benefits of having a dog during sorrow.
Reduced Stress and Anxiety
The National Institutes of Health (NIH) found that pet owners exhibited lower cortisol levels, a stress-related hormone, than non-pet owners. Petting a dog can trigger the release of endorphins and other feel-good chemicals in the brain, reducing stress and promoting relaxation, which all contribute to helping us deal with trauma and grief.
Enhanced Mood and Emotional Well-being
Dog owners aren’t as prone to depression and unhappiness, which helps them build a better foundation to handle grief than someone who doesn’t have pets. The happiness you experience with your dog before losing someone can help sustain you and give you direction for recovery.
Increased Resilience
It’s also noteworthy that dog owners are more resilient than non-pet owners. Resilience is needed for grief to be alleviated, and that’s where the dog comes in. Dogs are our strength during a time of need.
Personal Stories and Anecdotes
While scientific research provides valuable insights, personal stories, and anecdotes also highlight the profound impact dogs can have on us when we’re grieving. Several dog owners in my area have shared their experiences of finding comfort and strength in their canine companions during times of loss.
Sarah’s Story
Sarah lost her husband to cancer, and while she wanted to be brave, Sarah was struggling to cope and adjust. Max, her German Shepherd, was the only source of comfort she felt safe with.
“Max was there for me in a way that no one else could be,” Sarah recalls, tears welling up in her eyes. “He sensed when I was feeling down and would snuggle up to me, offering silent support. Taking him for walks gave me a reason to get out of bed each day, and his playful antics brought moments of joy into my otherwise dark days.”
John’s Journey
John, a Vietnam War veteran, never fully coped with the loss of his best friend in the war. People didn’t relate to the trauma he suffered there, nor the profound grief he felt for the loss of his friend who died in battle next to him. But his small mixed-breed dog, Bella, knew precisely what he needed and how to calm him when his sorrow brought on bouts of aggression.
“Bella gave me a sense of purpose and a reason to keep going,” John shares, his voice thick with emotion. “Her unconditional love and companionship helped me through the darkest times. She reminded me that life still had beauty and joy to offer.”
Emily’s Experience
When Emily’s daughter died in a tragic accident, it felt like her world had ended. Nobody could get through to her except for Luna, her daughter’s dog. Luna became a lasting connection and lifeline that kept Emily going.
“Luna was my anchor,” Emily says, her hands trembling slightly. “She helped me stay grounded and reminded me to care for myself, just like my daughter had taken care of Luna. Her playful energy and unconditional love brought light moments into my life when everything felt so dark.”
More Jack’s Dacks Articles
- Adopting Older Dogs: Where Do I Find a Senior Dog to Rehome?
- Welcoming An Adopted Older Dog – How to Welcome an Older Dog to Your Home
- Puppers and “Pawsioners” – Dog Walking Tips For a Young Dog and a Senior Dog
Final Grief
Grief is personal, deep, and isolating, but with loyalty and love constantly at your side (or on your lap), it’s impossible to lose all hope. Dogs bring a sense of purpose to our lives, and we are responsible for a bright, unconditionally loving being that relies on us.
Because of the presence of a dog, we overcame our primal grief on dark nights next to the fire, and the faithful dog has continued to share and alleviate our sorrow ever since. While many dog owners will attest to the power of their canine’s presence when life becomes bleak, the science also backs the benefits of having a dog during grief.
Dogs are good for our health, hearts, mood, and overall well-being. Dogs are perfect companions during grief, and as these personal stories have shown, dogs shine a light when all seems dark.
Learn how to deal with your dog’s grief and support them in my article on whether dogs grieve when they lose someone they love.